by Hope
I may have shared this before (the image that is,) but felt it was a good reminder especially this time of year. The holidays are hard for lots of people. I know they are for me, especially this year.
At this time last year, I was happily engaged, planning to take my engagement photos in just a couple of weeks and setting a wedding date. We were all going to be together for Thanksgiving here in Georgia after years of going to Texas. And we were going to have Thanksgiving with my Uncle and other extended family over in Clemson.
I had lost my dream job, but had gone right into a contract job that was supposed to go permanent. Everything wasn’t perfect, but it was pretty good. Well, excellent really. I was so in love and so ready for the next phase of my life.
Never Could of Predicted
I never in a million years would have guessed what all would go wrong in the next several weeks.
My beloved uncle died just a few weeks after Thanksgiving.
My fiancé ended our five year relationship over text the same night, just one short week before he was to move to Georgia.
My contract job would back out of becoming permanent and give me an end date early in the coming year.
As I look back at that time, it was so, so dark. So dark. I did not want to live.
One Year Later
One year later, and I would say I am just now starting to recover from the beat down I took mentally and emotionally. My heart still aches. And I cry out to God on a regular basis as to “why me?” Why this?
But as I work every day this month to focus on gratitude, I realize that this image is spot on. And as I sit looking out my back door, watching the dogs play, feeling the breeze and fresh air flow through my house, I realize…I am SO MUCH to be grateful for. So much!
Even on my worst day, my hardest day, my lowest moment, I have been so blessed with amazing kids, a glass half full attitude, and an ability to see adventure is absolutely everything that comes my way.
I pray that this holiday season truly blesses you. That you see hope for your future. That you can learn to appreciate what you have in spite of what you don’t have. And that you will find that the smiles around you light up your heart.
Hope is a digital marketing manager and foster/adoptive single mom to five kids. She has run her own consulting company for over 15 years and took a leap of faith returning to the corporate world in 2021 to a job and team she loves! Hope began sharing her journey with the BAD community in the Spring of 2015 and feels like she has finally mastered the balance between family first and wise financial decisions.
